Home > Football > International break leaves clubs with yet more complaints

International break leaves clubs with yet more complaints

November 12, 2011 Leave a comment Go to comments

With the international break in full-swing, a string of burglaries have been reported at several Premier League stadia.

Man United’s trophy cabinet was emptied, while West Brom’s stack of replica Championship trophies was also stolen.

Security staff up and down the country are said to have fallen asleep at their posts, with the lack of domestic activity leaving many tired and listless.

A source at an unnamed top-flight club said: “It’s horrible. They give us no time off, even in these barren international periods. All we are allowed to do to pass the time is watch re-runs of Paraguay v Japan at the last World Cup. Is it any wonder we are seeing such a crime wave?”

Newcastle owner Mike Ashley is being praised by club insiders for scaring away thieves by naming the ground the Sports Direct Arena. The head of security said: “Mike saw this coming. He knew thieves wouldn’t want to be seen stealing anything from such a cheap brand name.”

On being asked what, if anything, crooks would want to steal from the Magpies, he coughed nervously and put the phone down.

By Gerry

  1. November 28, 2011 at 09:01

    Great to see the Rugby League World Cup coming to Halifax! Even if it’ll probably be a match between two nations that I’ve never heard of

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